Sunday, April 12, 2009

In Defense of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt

Scientist mother - this should explain things a bit...

I'd like to tell a story about love:
imagine you were single for most of grad school life. not to say you didn't go through quite a few not-so-awesome excuses for dates, but really you didnt have boyfriends. there was one, back when you started you had one. you'd been together for about 3-4 years and he left after your first year of grad school to go back home...and though it tears you to pieces, and it takes forever to piece back together, in the end it is likely the best thing that ever happened to you. it is simply amazing what you will let yourself believe when someone you love tells you it is so...and you are 19. it is also amazing when you look back years later and think "holy shit was i retarded...that guy; that arrogant, insecure, overcompensatory asshole led me to believe that i was less than he..." grrrrrr.

and years later you do have a boyfriend who is fun at first (when you are drunk and enjoying just the fact that someone worhips you for how fucking cool you are) until you realize that he DOES NOT READ (books), and is mind-numbingly boring, and may have a phd but is truly an idiot. and you come to realize that there are things that are worse than being alone.

so you break it off and you live it up! you party all summer and do whatever you want. you answer to no one, you make extra money with a difficult TAship and you free lance doing non-science graphix and you love your life. and then you volunteer for some rich-people event just to have some fun and drink for free in the last year of your 20s...

but wait, there is a pre-amble. you are taking a month off in a couple months so lab work is super intense. there is a paper that was just rejected, but can be resubmitted if you completely develop RNAi techniques for your lab, but it is really hard work and you're competing with the research associate because this is the environment your boss foments. and then your friend's boyfriend, who just got a job working for a luxury boat company, invites you to this party weekend, you just have to help out a bit and lend a hand...its all included. so you agree to come, because it's the last long weekend of the summer. But then you get stuck because maybe the constructs are ready and all you want to do it work...but you're stuck becuase you've gone for the interview and they've accepted you and you are committed. and you feel like its a mistake because there is all this work to be done, and you can't afford time off, and besides, you're pretty sure that your friend's boyfriend wants you there for other less admirable reasons...he cares a little too much about your well-being if you know what i mean... then two days before you are set to go, you get the sequencing results and realize that you can take the weekend because low and behold, you still have no ability to subclone. period. so all these forces seem to work toward you going on this volunteering weekend for rich people to get away from it all...hehe, their lives are soooooooooo hard...anyway...

so on the morning of the departure, you're waiting for said friend's shitty boyfriend to pack up the boat, and you see this guyon the dock...but he could be anyone, he's not necessarily with your group, but even from a distance there is something about him. then you see him again later and he clearly IS with your group. and your heart jumps a bit...and then you actually meet him, cos he's there to work just like you...

he's not even your regular "type"...he's blond instead of brunet (no "ette" for boys...), and instead of your regular giant, he's only 5'10", with the most incredible turquoise eyes that pierce your brain when he looks at you, because he's looking into you rather than at you(r boobs/ass/legs/whatever). and you suspect he has a girlfriend cos guys like this always do...and you have real conversations straight away and you realize that he's not just some grunt at a lowly job, but someone who is something who can be so much and you see things you wish you weren't seeing because its too hard to hope that it could be real after so so so many losers come and gone (no pun intended...). and all you want to do is be near him, talking to him. and then you fuck. not the first night, but the second one. and its amazing. and then as it turns out there IS a girlfriend, though she was not permitted to come along, and it gets extremely complicated extremely fast.

he's crazy about you, you feel it, and he's trying so hard to stay away from you, but he always ends up there beside you. there is a gala, and you start getting anxious. you smoke 1000 cigarettes and get loaded. meanwhile you friend is soooooo unhappy but you're only vaguely aware cause there is your own personal drama and you are too drunk to do anything rational like take care of her. but she and this guy that you've already slept with, they make sure you get to bed...and of course, it is HIS. but they go back out, while you sleep it off. and when he comes in, you make love again. and in the morning again. and you are falling so fast and you are so scared because this is the best you've felt in so long...and it cannot be real...because there is this girlfriend...

on the way home, you leave your friend alone with the guy she has just dumped (while you were passed out), and you feel so shitty for it, but you need to be with this guy for as long as possible before the bubble breaks...and you have this amazing ride home, and this amazing conversation and you realize not that you are in danger of falling, but its gone so far beyond that...and all you can do is try to minimize the pain when its over because it cannot last...

but he's in love with you, and you share a cab home, and he kisses you good bye. and then...he leaves her within the week. he gets his own place. you get to help set it up. and you realize that it may not have been the most admirable way to go, but....this is the love of your life. and you didnt even know he existed two weeks ago...

that was almost two years ago. and there has been a lot of drama. but there has never been such a fit. there has never been such a bond and a closeness and an understanding. i am constantly amazed by what this man is capable of. we share a love of africa, we share a desire to help people, we share our passionate opinions, and lastly, but definitely not least; we share a passion for life and each other.

so i am sorry to say this, but kudos to Angelina and Brad for taking a chance doing the wrong thing to get to something so right.

2 comments:

  1. wow! a very passionate story. I shouldn't judge because my BFF *cheated* on her ex with her now husband...love is a funny thing. But notice how you gave him told him to end within weeks?

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  2. Wow - that was quite the story. It gave me goosebumps as I have gone through a couple love affairs that started off similar - although they did not turn out the way yours has (one lasted for two years, the other only two months). Love does work in funny ways, and sometimes people are just meant to be!

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